Nyko Wii Party Station - Suggested Enhancements

At the E3 expo, Nyko unveiled a new product called the Wii Party Startion. It contains cupholders, a fan for cooling and drying your hands like the ones they have in bowling alleys, dock areas for your Wiimotes, and even LED scoreboards for keeping track of who is kicking who's ass.

A friend of mine and I were discussing some of the things that we think might be added to this product. These enhancements should really increase the value and desirability of this product and I'm sure you'll agree when you take a look at the list below.

• Increase the size so that the center container can hold more chips and a mini-keg.
• Add a refridgeration component to the center container
• Add a pluggable attachment for a warming bin for queso dip. It ain't a party without queso dip.
• Increase the cup size
• Add a breathalizer attachment for the Wiimotes. Every so often, the Wiimote will prompt you to breathe into the tube. If you fail the test, the Wiimote needs to be handed to someone who can still stand up of their own volition. Also, if you vomit on the breathalizer, you're totally disqualified.
• Wii-style tap attachment for the mini-keg that broadcasts the amount of beer left in the keg so that it can be displayed in a HUD on whatever game you're playing
• Bluetooth support
  • Bluetooth support allows the party station to control a roomba to vacuum up all the chip fragments that the drunken idiots playing the games have been spilling
  • If you can find a bluetooth-enabled wet-vac, this would help out in cleaning up drunken stains of the liquid variety.
  • Wii Party Station should control a Robosapien so that it will scare off any nearby pets that might get in the way during a rousing game of Wii Tennis or Wii Bowling.
• Attachment for an easy-bake oven. The Wii Party station should continuously bake fresh cookies so long as at least one person is still passing the breathalizer test (see previous bullet item about the wiimote breathalizer attachment)
• Emergency 9-1-1 cord. In the event that someone pokes an eye out or lodges a Wiimote in a particularly painful location, simply pull the rip cord out of the base of the Wii Party Station and the appropriate authorities will be notified. Note that cord will not prevent the EMTs from laughing at you derisively.
• Blackmail addition - for an extra cost, the Wii Party Station should come with an onboard recording device. This way, when someone claims not to have done something or said something embarassing the next day, you can prove them wrong. Simply use the Wiimote to publish the 360-degree surround audio/video panorama of the night's festitivies on YouTube.

I think with this small list of extra features, the Wii Party Station could become the centerpiece of clean, family-oriented Wii gaming fun. Don't you? :)

tags: nyko  wii  wiipartystation  accessories  hardware  

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